Submitted by tony on March 23, 2008 - 3:24pm.
Disciplining
your toddler can be difficult. When you look into those sad, teary eyes, it can
almost break your heart to scold them or punish them for something they've done
wrong. But discipline is the only way to teach them how to be a part of
society. Many parents think the only type of discipline for toddlers is a spanking,
but there are many other effective forms of punishment. If you want to avoid
spanking, here are some more suggestions you can use to discipline your toddler
while teaching valuable life lessons.
- Provide a safe environment - At this age, your toddler is likely going
to test your limits and see how far
they can go before getting in trouble. Toddlers will explore their
surroundings and find activities that you won't be pleased with. One of the
best ways to combat this is to create a safe environment where your toddler can
explore safely without getting hurt. As they get older, set limits and
boundaries for them to follow.
- Reinforce good behaviors - It's much easier for a parent to positively
enforce a child's good behavior than it is to punish bad behavior. If you
notice your toddler doing something good, reward them with praise, a sticker or
a small toy.
- Avoid possible bad behavior by eliminating it before it starts - One way to do this is to
provide your toddler with choices. For example, instead of asking, "Do you want
to go outside?" rephrase the question by asking, "Do you want to go outside or
stay inside?" This avoids a "no" answer and gives the child an option and a
sense of control, even if it's only a tiny bit.
- Avoid yelling and hitting in anger. - This only gives your
child negative attention and reinforces their bad behavior. In addition to
that, it makes you look like you're not in control. Toddlers can sense this and use
it against you by continuing to misbehave. If you feel like you aren't in
control of your actions, walk away from your toddler until you regain a sense
of control over yourself.
- Give your toddler plenty of positive attention - Many toddlers misbehave
because they are seeking any type of attention they can get, even if it is
negative. And when they get any kind of attention, it reinforces the behavior
they were doing in the first place. However, if you make it a priority to pay
attention to your child, they won't usually seek out negative attention by
misbehaving.
- Show your toddler the consequences of their actions - For instance, if your
toddler breaks a toy, they can no longer play with it. If your toddler doesn't
put their toys away when they're supposed to, put them away and lock the toy
box so they can't play with them for a set amount of time. You can also
withhold some of the things they enjoy, such as TV or video games. After
awhile, your toddler will get the hint and likely change their behaviors to
avoid the negative consequences.
- Ignore your misbehaving child - This is a method called "extinction" and
is best when your toddler throws a temper tantrum or whines. You might be "that
parent" when you're at the supermarket, but it'll pay off after a few minutes
of ignoring your child.
- Learn when to use your authority - Not every situation will
call for you to assert
your authority on your toddler. Save this for the larger issues so your
child knows when they've done something really bad. Make sure your rules aren't
too strict or too lenient and be fair when enforcing the rules. If your toddler
breaks a rule, explain it clearly so they know better next time.
Disciplining
your toddler is sometimes as simple as setting up rules and boundaries. But
young children often test their limits to see what they can get away with.
Fortunately, though, there are some steps you can take to minimize your
toddler's misbehavior or prevent it in the future. With patience and time, you
can have a well-behaved toddler that grows up to be a well-behaved adult.