How to Discipline Your Child

The art of parenting revolves around one main concept - discipline. But it's not just any discipline that will work when trying to raise respectable children. With the many forms of discipline out there, you might be wondering which one is best for you and your kids in different situations. Unfortunately, it's not that easy. Since kids are all different, some methods work better with some children than others. But there are still some basic tenets of discipline that you can employ when raising your children. Consider these suggestions to help raise the best kids possible.

1. Realize what the word "discipline" means - When most parents hear that word, they think spanking, scolding or punishing. But it really refers to teaching and training. If you can retrain yourself to think of discipline as a teaching tool, you'll have a better idea of what to do when your child misbehaves.
   
   
2. Don't think of discipline as a way to force your child to behave well. - Any child will be good if they are afraid of you. But do you really want your child to be afraid of you for the rest of their life? Not only that, but they'll end up resenting you and hating your later in life for being such a fearsome figure.
   
   
3. Treat your child with respect - Aretha Franklin isn't the only person that insists on getting R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Children like it, too. Instead of punishing your child through embarrassment, humiliation, threatening or other belittling tactics, children respond positively to respect. This doesn't mean to treat your child like an equal, but modeling acceptable behavior and making your child feel worthwhile makes them less likely to misbehave. In effect, respect is a form of effective and positive discipline.
   
   
4. Make your rules and expectations clear - If you need to, make an oversized list of these rules and post them in the house so they can always see them. Make sure the rules are phrased in words that they child can understand, too. Instead of only punishing your child for breaking the rules, praise them when they follow the rules. Positive reinforcement with stickers or other rewards even works better than punishment for misbehaving.
   
   
5. Make the consequences known and stick to them - Have a list of consequences for each rule that gets broken so your child knows exactly what will happen when they misbehave. And don't make the mistake of being lenient in this area, too. It's pretty sad when a six-year-old child can manipulate their parents and get out of a punishment, so don't fall prey to their wily ways.
   
   
6. Give a real warning - Let's face it, kids will be kids. And that means they'll be rambunctious from time to time and get careless with the rules. Even as adults, we get a little careless with the rules at times, too. That's why police give warnings sometimes instead of tickets. Think of your warning to your child in the same way. If your child is misbehaving, simply tell them what will happen if they continue to misbehave. That's a fair way to deal with the situation and a great way to deter the behavior without any actual punishment.
   
   
7. Build up the consequences - When your child misbehaves, don't use three months of grounding as your first step in punishment. You might need to take it a step further so it's best to start out small. Besides, you don't want to punish yourself in the process. By starting out small, you get your point across without subjecting yourself to administering a long and complicated punishment.
   
   
8. Consistently evaluate your methods - If the consequences aren't working and your child is still running around like a maniac, you might need to try something else. Some kids will scoff at a spanking and ask for more just before going back and repeating the same behavior that caused the punishment in the first place.
   
   
9. Stay calm - If you start yelling and screaming when your child misbehaves, you're sending them the wrong message. You're saying it's acceptable to lose control of your temper when you don't get your way. Take a break if you feel yourself losing control so your kids don't see it.

Finding the best disciplinary method for your child is never easy. It might take some trial and error before finding the perfect tactics. But once you find those tactics, they're worth the time it took to find them. Fortunately, the above suggestions have been effective in a wide range of situations and families. Try them for yourself before deciding that your kids are a lost cause.