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Life Experience with 2 kids
Submitted by DaddyDaughterDay on July 17, 2008 - 8:17am.
What is your experience like with a toddler (2 - 3 yr old) and a new born at home? Please share any insight you might have. I read couple books but would like to know real life examples. My wife is 39 weeks pregnant and we are heading toward a new transition in life.
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2 and a half year old and 9 month old
My son was 22 months when we had our second little boy. I will admit, I was a little nervous about my oldest about to turn two and having a new born. However, he adjusted very well. We always made sure we let him know that the baby was "his" little brother and allowed him to participate in anything we were doing with the baby.... Now my youngest son is 9 months, my oldest is 2 1/2 and life couldn't be better. The oldest is always looking out for the youngest and loves entertaining him. Just make the entire situation (bringing baby home, feedings, diapers) a family affair and your older one will take responsibility and feel like he is included. Good luck and congrats...
You just take it day by day
That's how I pretty much dealt with the our almost 2 year old when she came. But I forsee some new challenges, like how to carry new baby (due in 6 weeks) and deal with the 2 year old and stuff like groceries and such. My wife is going to have a lot of the difficult issues as I work full time and she's currently in school. I think our 2 year old is going to "grow up" fast in order to help mom and dad and her younger sister. My that I mean, get in her car seat and wait nicely for us to get baby done and then get to her. Stuff like that. We're already working on some of those items.
I'm pretty sure I'll be here in a few weeks giiving updates :)
Good luck and enjoy, that's most important.
Jeff
I too am wondering the same.
My wife and I are now 8 weeks in with our wonderful son, but we can't help imagine how much more difficult a newborn will be when our current newborn is two or three. This being said, at this point, we're still thinking more than one (you just love em so much!)
Thanks for the great post.
3 y/o son, 11 mo/o daughter...
Aside from the germ sharing between the two and practicing my newfound patience with infants, we've had nothing but the most blessed family with two kids. My son's been the most helpful, great big brother... He loves his "sissy" and hugs and kisses on her all the time... Even calling her "princess", like his mom does.
Time's not that great of an adjustment for us, as a father, I actually manage to fair two children really well... Momma was out of town for a weekend recently, and I had both kiddos to myself... It was actually pretty easy and didn't miss any feedings, baths or bedtimes... Did miss some TV, but it's well worth it to have with my kids.
-Bryan
Dallas, TX
Having a baby with a 2-year old
We have had 10 children and most were born about 19 months apart. Life isn't formulaic but here is something we did intentionally with each. Having a baby is very much a family affair and we involved the little ones as soon as they were ready. We didn't force anything on them but we got excited with them to hold the baby, told them what a good big brother or sister they are, help them find their place as an "older" sibling. Around birth times we did give the older sibling extra attention; it's only natural to feel left out when all the comotion is about the "new baby". We felt very strongly about protecting our children's sense of belonging. I believe they found security in this and didn't feel (as) threatened as they could have. Lots of lovin! Our "kids" are now 14-28 and, though not all live at home, they love spending time with each other.
It definitely requires change
Having a second very needy child definitely requires a change in the way you approach household duties. In my experience, it means no more trading off with your spouse for a little "me" time for each of you; you'll have a kid either on you or interacting with you both until the kids fall asleep. It's not bad, though it does kind of sound like it, it's just different. You toddler will soon get to the point where he or she is more self-reliant and you can go whole minutes at a time without making a bottle or sippy cup, feeding somebody , or changing a diaper.
The other thing that occurs to me is a mistake I made. I didn't spend as much one-on-one time with my second daughter, and tended to be less creative and, frankly, less connected to my second daughter. I deeply regret not spending that extra time alone with her and am trying to make up for it now.
two kids
having a toddler and an infant, as we do, presents many challenges. The single greatest challenge is quite simply---time. When we only had one child, if my wife was tired, she could pass our daughter on to me, and vice versa. Now that we have two girls, 31 months and 9 months respectively, our free time is at a premium...
Enjoy every moment with the new additions, but make scheduled time for yourselves when you can...try to have just as many good times with your wife as you will with your kids on the way....
and congrats in advance
a~
I am wondering the same...
as we have a 2 year old boy, and twins on the way! Life will never be the same, but I am excited none-the-less!
I have 3 kids 4, 2, and 6 months
Just like you did when your first one came, you roll with the punches. Life does get a bit more hectic. You used to have that free time when the kid was playing with your wife or sleeping. You will still have some of that but not nearly as much. Its really important to keep quality time with your wife (for sanity sake). Since our family lives out of town it isn't so much date nights as it is taking little moments together... especially when the kids go down to sleep. The first month or two is pretty tough as you adjust but now I couldn't imagine life with just one.
Make sure you give your 2 year old jobs to help out with - can you help Daddy throw this diaper out? My son and daughter both love to help out. Also since Mom is going to be spending so much time with the baby (out of necessity) I tried to focus on spending time with the other one(s). Take them out on special Daddy days - stopping to get a slushy from Sonic together on the way home or having them go for a walk with me. That seemed to help
Good luck and congratulations!
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