by Anthony Romanelli

B-R-E-A-T-H-E and S-T-R-E-T-C-H...

In the American Heritage College Dictionary Yoga is defined as: "1. a Hindu discipline aimed at training consciousness for a state of perfect spiritual insight and tranquility. 2. A system of exercises practiced as part of this discipline to promote control of the body and mind. Yoga- Union, joining."

While I'm well aware of the definition of yoga, I think we are about to put it into practice. Not for me, I'm plenty "yoga-fied," but for our daughter, 31 months and as hyper as the day is long. Don't believe me? Come follow me on one daily dose of toddler insanity...

Our daughter seems to have SERIOUS issues when Daddy comes into the room as she wakes from her nap. When my wife walks in, there's the occasional whimper and bed-head, as she is just coming to...however, when I walk in, she SCREAMS, "NO, DADDY!" It has happened twice in the last week and has been happening for quite some time. To prove to my wife I do nothing differently, I made her stand outside our daughter's door as I walked into her room.

It begins like this: "MOMMY," she calls from the door. The issue arises upon the opening of the door, by....me. "NO, DADDY, I WANT MOMMY."

As calm as the seas, I state, "I'm sorry, sweetheart, Mommy is busy right now."

"NOOOO," she screams.

This continues, "NO, NO, NO,"

I wait in the room. I walk to the corner of the room and sit in the chair while I listen to ‘daddy's little girl,' blubber like ‘daddy's-never-ending-crier." I wait longer. I am upwards of 7 - 8 minutes while she just cries and cries.

"Honey, once you calm down, then we can leave the room. Mommy is busy, and your sister is still sleeping," I say.

Rocking with stuffed kitty and blanket in hand, the bellowing mellows itself for the briefest of moments. I naively believe we're in the clear and we can proceed downstairs. I actually have the nerve to GET UP from the chair, really believing we can go.

"NO, NO NO," flails the little one. We are now at about 11 minutes post wake up, still trying desperately to leave the sob filled carpet. She begins to anxiously pick at her toenails, wanting to fight me every step of the way.

"It looks as if your toenail is half-off, would you like Daddy to help get it off?"

"Mm-hmm. Yes."

"EUREKA," I say to myself.

I lean in and tug at her toenail, realizing it's not going anywhere without a legitimate clipping. The last thing I need is to erupt ‘Mount Saint Maggie' again. "Let's go downstairs and get that clipped."

"NOOOOOO!" And erupt, she does.

"Damnit," I think to myself. "I thought I was there with her, in the clear, ready to go. Damnit, damnit, damnit."

At that very moment, I realize that my daughter may truly be lacking the coping skills needed when things are not going her way. We are 14 minutes post nap and still nowhere closer to getting downstairs and beginning our afternoon.

Yoga. That's what she needs. She needs to be taught how to breathe. Though we have showed her how to breathe when she gets angry, she does not use the technique. I exit the room and say one simple word to my wife, "See?

She does see. She has always known that our daughter wakes easier with her for some reason. We have tried everything we can think of and now wonder if finding ways to calm her inner seas through yoga is the answer. A tiny yoga mat for tiny feet and a monster temper? Not sure the mat is big enough for the two of them...Is it?

Is it? Any advice? I am 100% willing to listen.

As an additional FYI, we have tried AT LEAST the following:

• Shown her how to breathe
• Look us in eye when doing so
• Made her count to calm herself down (big fans of that 1-2-3) book
• Make her call for Daddy and not Mommy, that way she's expecting me
• Left the room, waited for her to calm down, then I still open the door (if we give in to allowing my wife to open the door, there's no consistency there)
• I have told her, and not my wife, "Ok, you may come out now."

It seems as if this is a ‘Daddy Only' issue...AND, this is the only time she explodes like this WITH me....she only explodes when I walk into the room upon her waking herself up from nap...

Need advice.

I could go on, but I actually applaud you for getting this far...



A~